An alien view on human behaviour

The more I interact, as I have to do every day, the more I understand that I’m an alien otherwise I could not explain any behaviour of those humans. Help me to make sense of this please:

Someone hosted me on Couchsurf. He seemed kind, I brought gifts he likes very much. The second day of my stay I had to leave at 7.40ish in the morning with him, because he didn’t want to leave me his house keys and I stayed outdoor all day. Our meeting in the afternoon-evening at the station was at 19.00 and he arrived 40 minutes later and we had no ways to communicate with each other. I called him with a public phone and he didn’t reply. Needless to say I started to panic. That evening I was also supposed to go to my second couch host (because the first one couldn’t host me for four nights but only two) and so once I arrived at home and I prepared my things I left. Things were a bit awkward and I thought that I had done something, but apparently no, he was simply busy, this is what he said. He writes a positive review on the CS platform and then blocks my number on Whatsapp. I am still wondering if this makes sense.

The second couchhost was another case of “am I doing something wrong?”. We met in the evening and he was all happy and chivalrous. He took my suitcase, showed me his home, chatted friendly, wanted to go out to eat something, absolutely insisted to pay for my salad. Overall he seemed super nice and he was a good looking guy who also knew it. So that same evening, after I had a shower and was ready to go to bed, he came a couple of meters away without his T-shirt on and spoke about something I don’t actually remember. All I remember is that he clearly spent more time exercising than on books. I don’t know how he managed to have five degrees as he said to have. So he showed a bit his physique and then I said “well, good night”. The following day I bought for him a small present and I wanted to prepare one of my favourite dishes, gnocchi with tomato sauce for the evening meal. When he returned home he wasn’t very chatty, didn’t want to eat carbohydrate in the evening and he was very annoyed by me talking. We watched a TV series, there was no showing off that night. The following day I left in the afternoon (it rained all day) and as goodbye message he wrote: “are you still at home? I want to sleep when I return at 16.00” I got the message and left before that time. I then whatsapped him asked if I had done anything wrong that bothered him and he did not reply. Whatsapp showed the two blue ticks, so I guess he just didn’t want to have anything to do with me. So am I the alien here?

On the fifth day I moved to my shared apartment. My flatmate was all smiley and friendly when I came to see the place, after I moved in she barely talks to me. It is a lot if she says “ok”, “yes”, “bye”. It’s a lot because she established an unspoken role of avoidance for which if I am in the kitchen she and her boyfriend stay in their room and if they are in the kitchen I have to stay in my room. She switched from super nice to super avoidance in a matter of three days. I asked ten times if I had done anything that bothered and the answer has always been “no”. So I wonder if this is considered normal.

I can go on ad infinitum.

 

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